mousapelli: (corruptin ur jrz)
[personal profile] mousapelli
Title: Close-Knit [Koyama/NEWS]
Rating/Warnings: PG for gun warmers.
Summary: Koyama takes up a new hobby during the long stakeout hours.
AN: Set in the Government AU verse, which is [livejournal.com profile] peroxidepest17's, because she wanted "agent Koyama to try knitting mittens for his teammates. Pink ones. And they wear them. And get made fun of and then PUNCH PEOPLE IN THE FACE WITH THEM ON."


Close-Knit

At first, it's just something for Koyama to do during long missions and overnight stakeouts.

"Ooh," Tegoshi leans in and examines the glitter of the long, thin metal with interest. "Are those new weapons, Kei-chan?"

"Nope," Koyama answers, and then he reaches into his very cool agent bag and pulls out a ball of fuzzy, pink yarn.

"Um," Masuda says hopefully, "is that cleverly disguised, explosive yarn?"

"Nope," Koyama says, then double-checks the label. "But it is machine washable."

Masuda exchanges a glance with Tegoshi, who just shrugs cutely, and then they go back to their respective jobs, Tegoshi watching the monitors inside the van and Masuda making sure the signal on the wiretap is clear as he listens in.

Koyama, who is only there for backup and coffee runs anyway, props a card with directions on it up on the little work ledge and starts a steady stream of knits and purls, tongue stuck out in concentration.

By the time that Yamapi, Ryo, and Shige come to relieve them, hours later, Koyama has a hand cramp and a pink tube about three inches long, and jumps a foot in the air when Ryo yanks open the van door and hisses, "What the hell is that ticking noise?"

"Ticking noise?" Tegoshi asks, looking up with computer-glazed eyes. Masuda, huge spy headphones still on, doesn't even notice people are talking.

Koyama holds still to listen. "I don't hear anything," he shrugs after a second, fingers picking up where they left off.

"There!" Ryo exclaims, tracking the sounds with narrowed eyes. "It's coming from…what are you doing?"

"Knitting!" Koyama holds up his work proudly. Pushing Ryo into the van and out of the way, Yamapi and Shige examine the pink tube with interest.

"It's not explosive," Masuda yawns to Yamapi, finally having caught on that a conversation was occurring.

"But it's machine washable!" Koyama replies to the yarn's defense. Shige wraps a hand around the yarn and tests its squishiness with interest.

"Stop it!" Ryo snaps, hopping into the van and grabbing Koyama's needles to still them. "You can't do that!"

"Maa, Ryo," Koyama tries to tug his needles free. "Knitting is getting very popular these days, you know. There's nothing wrong with men showing their creative side."

"You're on a stakeout," Ryo says through gritted teeth, "and your flower delivery van sounds like it's ticking."

"Oh," Koyama says, crestfallen. "Sorry, everyone. I definitely can't knit anymore if it endangers the mission."

"Hey," Shige says suddenly, setting the yarn back down. "Does anybody want coffee?" And then he hops back out of the van without waiting for anybody to answer and dashes off.

Koyama sighs, because now he doesn't even have a real job.

Tegoshi and Masuda fill Yamapi and Ryo in on what's been going on during their shift while Shige is out. Koyama stays too, even though he doesn't have anything to add, and smoothes the nap of the yarn down sadly.

His frown disappears when Shige returns with five coffees and a hot chocolate, and also a small plastic bag with a craft store logo which he hands to Koyama.

"Shige!" Koyama exclaims after looking inside, voiced choked with emotion, and holds up the wood knitting needles for everyone to admire.

"Doesn't anything explode anymore?" Masuda asks sadly, and Tegoshi placates him with marshmallows.

Koyama just beams. "Shige's present will definitely be first."

Shige scuffs his foot, Ryo rolls his eyes, and everybody else perks up at the word 'present.'

Over the next few weeks, Koyama uses Shige's present at every available opportunity, and it turns out that when he presents Shige with a gift in return, that what he is knitting are fuzzy, pink mittens. He industriously starts on the next pair right away, which takes him only about half as long now that he's got some experience, and in the end, Koyama practices enough that he can knit a whole mitten in two shifts.

"I wanted to wait and do Ryo-chan's last," Koyama explains, holding out the mittens in question, "so that they'd turn out best of all."

"Kei-chan," Ryo sighs, "I'm a sniper, I definitely can't wear mittens—" But then Ryo interrupts himself by slipping the mittens on and discovering that Koyama has knitted the top part to flip down, revealing fingerless gloves underneath.

"Hunh," Ryo grumbles, trying not to look up at how Yamapi and Tegoshi are scrunching their mittens at each other. "I guess that's fine, then."

They tease Koyama about it, of course, because they love him and because it's obvious who on their team Koyama picked the pink out for, and use their mittens for silly things like gun warmers and hand grenade pouches.

Then they go on the mission to Hokkaido in the dead of winter, and all the teasing suddenly stops.

Within the group, at least.

"Are you going to all be wearing doilies next?" Jin from KAT-TUN whoops, leaning hard on Nakamaru and interrupting Nakamaru and Koyama's session with the trainees. "You should have Koyama knit you all camouflage bodysuits!"

Even the trainees snicker about it when they pass in the hallway sometimes, but when Yamapi catches anybody doing it, he turns around and lectures them about member-ai and frostbite, until they are nodding at whatever he says with glazed eyes.

Eventually word travels up the food chain to their superiors, and Tackey makes a surprise visit to one of NEWS's training sessions with concerns about stealth.

"I just think the pink," he tries to explain gently to Koyama, "might compromise some of the more delicate operations, ne, Koyama-kun?"

"But pink was the warmest," Koyama answers, staring at his feet and failing not to blush in the presence of his senpai. But, despite that, he is determined to hang in there and explain for the sake of NEWS's members. "I was only thinking about the health and safety the other members."

"I'm sure you were," Tackey tries again, "but…"

Just then, the sparring match Ryo and Masuda are having swings a little close, and Tackey's eyebrows raise when Masuda's mittened fist connects squarely with the sound of metal hitting Ryo's cheekbone, and Ryo goes down like Senga-kun on skates.

"Holy hell," Ryo groans from the ground, and Tackey turns back to Koyama.

"What exactly did you knit them out of?" he asks, and Koyama shrugs.

"I made a few upgrades," he says, "after Hokkaido."

A week later, NEWS is allotted an arts and crafts budget, and Koyama's mittens become standard issue for all teams.

Date: 2008-06-19 04:21 am (UTC)
dipping_sauce: (i think my head is starting to clear)
From: [personal profile] dipping_sauce
ROFFLES

WHO THE FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE?

Date: 2008-06-19 04:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ryogrande.livejournal.com
THIS IS SO CUTE. i love how massu wants everything to explode and shige is the coffee bitch BUT HE GETS WOOD KNITTER THINGERS FOR KEI-CHAN and they are PINK and awesome and koyama is so thoughtful i love it. <33333

Date: 2008-06-19 04:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] procreational.livejournal.com
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Date: 2008-06-19 05:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kenaressa.livejournal.com
What did he upgrade them WITH?!! O_O

Date: 2008-06-19 05:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peroxidepest17.livejournal.com
MOUSIE I LOVE YOU SO HARD YOU HAVE NO IDEA TONIGHT'S MEETING WAS HORRIBLE BECAUSE MY GROUPMATE'S DOG CHEWED UP MY SHOE WHILE WE WEREN'T LOOKING BUT I CAME BACK TO THIS AND IT WAS THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER.

I...I love how Massu wants everything to EXPLODE. And...and I WAS HOPING JIN WOULD GET PUNCHED IN THE FACE FOR LAUGHING but it's fine, NEXT TIME.

ALSO KOYAMA IS THE CUTEST THING IN THE WORLD OH MY GOD.

;-; Thank you. You made a REALLY BAD NIGHT REALLY BETTER. <3333

Date: 2008-06-19 09:17 am (UTC)
ext_5724: (yarnporn yay)
From: [identity profile] nicocoer.livejournal.com
WIN!

ALSO YAY FIBER ARTS! (IT'S FIBER ARTS, NOT ARTS AND CRAFts. um. *blink blink*)

Date: 2008-06-19 03:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snowqueenofhoth.livejournal.com
I BET YOU CAN GUESS WHICH BIT WAS MY FAVORITE. :D

Date: 2008-06-19 04:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lyto.livejournal.com
Brass Knuckles probably. XD

Date: 2008-06-19 04:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
lol, they're NEWS, one of the JE boybands, just...as if they were government agents.

This is what I get for telling Pero that I'd write her anything she wanted XD

Date: 2008-06-19 04:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Date: 2008-06-19 04:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
XD XD XD XD XD XD

WHEN ARE YOU AROUND FOR ME TO PLY YOU WITH W-INDS.

Date: 2008-06-19 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
LOL, right, that's pretty much was i was thinking.

KOYAMA IS AMAZING!

Date: 2008-06-19 04:28 pm (UTC)

Date: 2008-06-19 04:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
MAYBE.

I like that tackey has concerns about stealth.

Date: 2008-06-19 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mousapelli.livejournal.com
AWWWWW, any time!!!

Jin gets punched in the face a lot, I'm sure. Mostly by his own team.

Date: 2008-06-21 04:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ayumwu.livejournal.com
ROFL @ the last line. Koyama should stop being an explosives specialist and start being "the guy behind strong, member-lovin' weapons".

Date: 2008-06-21 08:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peroxidepest17.livejournal.com
YOU MEAN YOU GET COMIC GENIUS?

Date: 2008-06-22 06:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gothicauthor.livejournal.com
...

They.

They sound so cool. @.@

I can just imagine the pink mittens like those gloves in "Cherish."

GA

Date: 2008-06-23 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snow-meow.livejournal.com
What's with NEWS...does every member thing that something Koyama makes with his hands must explode ? ^___^

Shige is so sweet to buy those wooden knitting needles for Kei. I guess he knew how bored Kei gets.

I love the last part where Massu's mittens take Ryo down. That was hilarious.
Koyama's upgrade is something not to mess around with.

Those pinks mittens makes me think of Cherish gloves ^^

Date: 2008-06-29 05:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] silverrangel.livejournal.com
i loved koyama's cuteness and everyone's concern for him, but mostly i really really love this line:

"Doesn't anything explode anymore?" Masuda asks sadly

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Date: 2008-07-09 12:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jojibear.livejournal.com
Ahahahahahahahahahaha.

xD

I'm laughing so hard I actually fell off the chair I was sitting on xD

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

This was so amazing I love it!!!

-still in hysterics-

Yassu definately approves of this 8D

Date: 2009-01-10 11:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tinahyena.livejournal.com
omg!! this is hilarious!!!

Date: 2009-09-16 01:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sanjihan.livejournal.com
omg this is so awesome. :D It's a wonderful and perfect addition to Pero's Gov AU. :D :D :D

"What exactly did you knit them out of?" he asks, and Koyama shrugs.

"I made a few upgrades," he says, "after Hokkaido."

A week later, NEWS is allotted an arts and crafts budget, and Koyama's mittens become standard issue for all teams.

HAHAHAHA.

Thank you.
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